It’s been a long 15 months.
“Mom, are you going to eat that?”
“Can I have a sip?”
“Mom, I want just one tiny bite, please.”
“Is that the last string cheese?”
“Mom, I’m still hungry. Can I have your slice of pizza?”
In the last 15 months, I can’t remember the last time I ate a meal in peace. Without someone picking, touching or swiping what’s on my plate, in my hand, or sometimes even partially already in my mouth.
I’ve brought string cheese into the shower, only to have my daughter bust in and snatch it before I could take a bite. I’ve hidden Reese’s Pieces in my pocket, only for little hands to pry them out one by one. I have tried eating my favorite Subway sandwich (with white bread, of course) under the covers, in my bed, only to be interrupted by a quiet but persistent knock.
“Mom, sharing is caring!” they exclaim, hurling my own words back at me. Like vultures, they pull apart my sandwich, picking and choosing the parts they like. I am left staring at a pile of shredded lettuce and some squished black olives.
As I chew on the pieces of lettuce, I am momentarily transported back to the days where I would slurp down a nice strawberry mango banana smoothie with two chicken tacos with hot sauce on the side. Back in the days when I would be at a desk, in the office, all alone, scrolling People.com for the latest Hollywood gossip during what then seemed like the shortest lunch break ever. Thirty minutes now for lunch seems like I am being overindulgent.
Undoubtedly, there’s a lot of anxiety and fear about returning to the office. Some say there’s nothing they miss about the office. They don’t miss their long commutes or the crowded trains. They don’t miss getting sick. They get more done at home without interruptions (note to self: must not have young children). And, for the first time since the start of the pandemic, apparently some people feel fully rested (repeat note to self: must not have young children).
Presently, I don’t share any of those anxieties or fears. Because here’s the No. 1 reason I’m excited to return to the office. It’s not because I am excited for adult interaction that isn’t with my husband. It’s not because I’m excited to aimlessly scroll my phone on crowded public transportation during my daily commute. It’s not because I’m looking forward to working at a proper desk (FYI, I have been using my husband’s college beer pong table as my makeshift desk in the corner of my bedroom for the entire pandemic).
It’s because I will be able to eat lunch alone. With no one next to me. All. By. Myself.
I won’t have my string cheese snatched. I can eat an entire granola bar on my own. I won’t have to leave my hot cup of tea on the table to answer the incessant chants and wailing, MOMMY! I won’t have my colleague picking bread and salami off my plate. I can indulge in 30 minutes of eating without having to share one piece of my meal. I won’t be restricted to hiding and eating in my bedroom, afraid the vultures will descend. I can even go out to lunch! This is a level of self-care I didn’t realize I needed.
I joined my employer, Carta, during the pandemic last October. I haven’t even been to our New York City office in One World Trade Center. I sighed in relief when I heard they had free tea and coffee alongside other caffeinated beverages. I shed a tear when I heard they had free snacks, like granola bars and cheese packs. And again when I heard they offered a variety of frozen treats, from Klondike bars to fancy popsicles I’ve never even heard of. I almost stopped breathing when I heard they offered free lunch in the office. I don’t even care what it is–as long as it’s not a pile of shredded lettuce, I will happily eat it.
So, I know I hold a position of great privilege, but I am ready to return to the office. To enjoy at least one meal in peace. And I am happy to socialize and meet my coworkers as we sip our skim chai lattes and eat our Greek salads with the dressing on the side. I just won’t be sharing anything with anyone. To my new coworkers reading this: Keep your hands off my plate, please.
Mita Mallick is the Head of Inclusion, Equity and Impact at Carta and loves living in Jersey City with her husband and two young kiddos.
Career
It’s been a long 15 months.
I know not everyone is ready to return to the office, but here’s why I am.
